Motivation

It's difficult to be motivated all the time. Honestly, I think it's difficult to be motivated most of the time. I often hear the term self-motivation, and simply can't seem to grasp what exactly it is, or how it could truly be a reality.

This past fall I worked in direct sales for a privately owned dealer of a major brand home security system. Cold calling. Door to door. It was emotionally brutal. Rejection after rejection. Occasionally I would win someone over at the door. They would be convinced enough of my authenticity and the legitimacy of my “free promotion” that they would invite me inside and eventually provide me, an “Advertising Representative,” with their Social Security number (for credit check purposes), their banking info (EFT for the monthly payment), and a check for the $99.00 activation fee. This was no small feat, and I would have never made a sale if it had not been for my wingman, an older friend who got me the job and then helped train me.

Each morning I would show up for a sales meeting (read: pep rally) at the company “office,” an unbelievably depressing building they were leasing that appeared to have once been a fast food restaurant, maybe a Taco Bell. My boss (and sometimes his boss) would stand in front of the group of washed-up former used car salesmen, out of work contractors, and drifting philosophy majors (the last category included only my friend and me), and spew catch phrases like “fake it till you make it!” and “people's fear of loss is greater than their anticipation of gain!” (At the end of the meeting he would ask, “What are we gonna do today?!” and we were to respond with “Help people! Have fun! Make money!” My friend said it reminded him of being in the Marines where they would respond with “Kill! Kill! Kill!”.

Anyway, at one of the meetings (my last one actually) I looked at the co-worker sitting next to me; he seemed to be taking notes on the pep talk. He was actually just manically writing over and over on his page, “YOU HAVE TO WORK YOU HAVE TO WORK YOU HAVE TO WORK YOU HAVE TO WORK...” It's hard to describe the oppressive horror and ironic hilarity of the situation. This kid couldn't have been more than 25, may have done some college. I would assume his personal aspirations, at least his career aspirations, were higher than what he was doing right now. I like to think that was true of everyone there. But many of them were just demotivated people who needed to make money. (Funny how people lacking in motivation would choose to be in sales).

I know an IT guy who is originally from the slums of India. He moved to the states to go to college when he was young. He has lived in 18 different countries, knows four or five languages, and is well accomplished in his field. From talking to him, I get the impression that the only obstacles he sees or considers in the world are external, much greater obstacles than I have ever had to face: severe lack of money, education, not being in geographic proximity to good opportunities, etc. In my world (the western middle class) all the obstacles seem internal: lack of self-discipline, demotivation, perfectionism, fear of failure, taking self too seriously, etc.

These obstacles seem invalid and petty compared to great physical obstacles such as spoken language and availability of education, but they are real to me and—as I am noticing—most of my generation. We are being called the “entitlement” generation by the working world, and appropriately. We are, in many ways, the most privileged generation in the history of the world and we have trouble getting out of bed in the morning. I don't think this is coincidental.

This topic could use some elaborating, but I'm out of motivation.